Why only a woman is questioned about her virginity and not men ?

Where we talk so much of equality, when it comes to a virgin partner, where does the entire equality saying go ?

From a long time, woman’s virginity has been her prized possession. It is the most healthy and pervasive of all sexual myths of the history. So much of advancement are there, everyone talks about feminism and breaking stereotypes towards women, there still exists, in many parts of India a few traditions of inhumane tests to know whether the girl is virgin or not, just to know if a man is going to be her ‘first’ or has she already ‘lost’ it. These so called traditions lead to evasion of woman’s privacy and a traumatic experience of their life. Many things are done to check if the hymen is intact which is traumatizing and humiliating for the women. The customs still continue to bind the country and show the reality of villages in the country today. What’s more sad is that if a woman fails these so called tests, they are considered as impure and are shamed by one and all.

So many girls are warned from an early age to be careful with their activities and not to break the hymen, as they fear of losing their virginity. But what does losing virginity actually mean?? An intact hymen is not a sign of virginity. A woman’s hymen can be ruptured while playing, dancing, sports and many other activities. It is not necessary for a virgin to bleed the first time she has sex. In fact, very few do.

Looking for traces of lost virginity on the bed sheets is an old tradition. As there still is so much expectation for many women to be virgins on their wedding day. In order to check if the bride is a virgin, a white sheet is spread on their bed on the first night. But God forbid if it isn’t there, the bride is bashed to be an ‘impure’ one. And she is further beaten and threatened.

But that’s not all, the worst thing is that our law does not consider it as a crime and has no rule or section regarding it; a woman cannot even lodge a complaint. There is no section regarding this in out Indian Penal Code. This is gross violation of woman’s rights, but our Indian government is yet to make a law, forcing thousands of women suffer silently.

Remember, virginity and chastity is not the base of a happy marriage, honesty and trust are far more important which both partners should share.

Because such practices are still prevalent in many part of our country, these illogical tests continue to be a life changing event for the girl and her family.


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